Interlude: Storytime w/ Mr. Steiner!

Ever wondered what it's like to be a sentient piggy bank with a penchant for interdimensional mischief? Join us as we navigate the zany world of Mr. Steiner, Dr. Apples' delightfully chaotic personal assistant. From preventing appliances from opening wormholes to entertaining alien diplomats with dubious truth serums, Mr. Steiner’s escapades promise to keep you laughing and on the edge of your seat. You’ll hear all about his unique challenges, from taming rogue gadgets to interpreting ancient texts, all while managing the unpredictable antics of Dr. Apples.
 
 Prepare yourself for a hilariously unpredictable ride as Mr. Steiner regales us with his candid confessions and whimsical anecdotes. Discover the true meaning of intergalactic paperwork and why you should always have bacon on hand. With tales that span across dimensions and species, including a memorable mix-up with Martian aphrodisiacs, this episode is sure to leave you in stitches. So, tune in, have a laugh, and perhaps bring some bacon along for the journey—Mr. Steiner assures us it's life-changing!

CAST: 
Mr. Steiner / Elderly Ghost  - Jon Mcnally

Transcript

Interlude: Storytime w/ Mr. Steiner!

MR. STEINER

00:11

Oopsie!

(nervous)

Uh, greetings, esteemed visitor! Terribly sorry about teleporting you here.

—I was fine-tuning this gizmo for interdimensional pub crawls, not… audience abduction.
 
 00:26

But as they say, 'Every cloud has a silver lining'

—unless it’s dropping a load on your head.

00:35

Any who, welcome to my humble Command Center! If you can’t recall, I’m Mr. Steiner, Dr. Apples’ other personal assistant. A sentient piggy bank to some, and intergalactic hustler to others.

00:50

Lacie’s not keen on space travel, so I’m the one left to babysit Dr. Apples while he’s off gallivanting through the cosmos. 

Not that I’m actually watching him.

—I'm far too busy making sure my toaster doesn’t start a wormhole.

 (punches a few buttons)

1:04

While Dr. Apples is dosing alien diplomats with truth-serum, laced with fallacies to spice up his final Storytime episodes, I’m here fixing gadgets, interpreting ancient books, and

(frustrated with buttons)

filing enough intergalactic paperwork to fill a black hole—

-in a

-reach up

-when I flick

1:32

—smoother than a buttered crumpet, if I do say so myself.

(sigh of relief)

My, that remark was rather offensive. You’ll get over it.

1:04

Now, before you get too comfy, I really must send you back.

Doc is still mad at me for that unfortunate incident involving Martian aphrodisiacs and air freshener.

1:52

Thanks ever so much for dropping in, albeit unintentionally.

 (panicked)

I’ll just recalibrate this thingy to avoid any more… spontaneous visits.

(relieved)

2:05

Wow. I can’t believe that worked! 

Well, stay tuned for even zanier Storytime with Dr. Apples- 

2:17

-uhh episodes. 

2:20

The portal’s open now. Goodbye!

2:24

Oh! Next time you stop by, bring me some bacon, would ya? I’ve heard it’s life-changing.

(yell from afar)

2:32

And if you bump into Howard the comet, tell him to run me my money.

(giggles & snorts)

[theme song]

KPop Singer
2:45
He's smarter than you, but it's okay because he’s cute. Mmm-hmmm. 

DR. APPLES
Don't forget to like, subscribe & leave a review! Or else, I'll take away all your cabbage. 

KPop Singer
He's smarter than you, but it's okay because he’s cute.