Dr. Apples ®

STORYTIME - The Lost Laundry Legend And The Shoe Syndicate's Sinister Scheme

Lacye A. Brown Season 2 Episode 26

Ever wonder what happens when you lose a sock in the laundry?  Get ready for spin cycle shenanigans with Dr. Apples as he investigates "The Lost Laundry Legend and the Shoe Syndicate's Sinister Scheme!" When his favorite sock pulls him into a portal, he lands in the lint trap of the universe, battling a shoe syndicate with more twists than a pretzel.  reunite them. Join us as we navigate a labyrinth of forgotten relics and more. 
 
But that's not all—prepare to be transported into a realm where upcycling meets whimsy, and worn-out flip-flops find new life as vibrant phone cases. With themes of creativity and sustainability woven into a tapestry of magical storytelling, these two paragraphs will make sense in the end after listening to this wonderful episode!  It’s a tale to knock your socks off—or at least keep you entertained! 

CAST
Dr. Apples - Anthony J. Santora
Mr. Steiner - Jon Mcnally
Flip-Flap - Devin Baird
Boot-Tista / Sock 7 - Cormac Brennan
Kicks Fury - Matt Beckius
Sock 4 - Mel Torrefranca
Extra Socks - Lacye A. Brown

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STORYTIME W/ DR. APPLES - THE LOST LAUNDRY LEGEND AND THE SHOE SINISTER SCHEMES.

Narrator 

(00:07)
Step right into the mystical universe of story time with Dr. Apples. You've just been transported through Dr. Apple's magical time warp.

 

0:19

A universe where every tale spins A web of enchantment ready for a journey into the heart of magic. Today's story promises to be as entrancing as Dr. Apple's collection of dancing shadows. 

 

0:37

Strap in for an adventure that'll twist your perception of reality. We now join Apples in his library. 

 

DR. APPLES

 (01:02)
Oh, greetings intrepid. Listeners, welcome back to the chaos that is my life. Dr. Apples here. You've caught me decoding a magnificent sock. Yes, you heard that correctly. It's a relic from my dear mother. Lost in the sands of time and now returned by postal service courtesy of some hooligan.

 

1:32

Oh, I should tell you the story. Let's rewind to that bizarre day. 

 

1:53

I was sorting the last remnants of my laundry from the dryer. Lacie's paycheck doesn't cover laundry duties. Just as I was rescuing my last pair of polka dotted underpants, my eye caught a glimpse of something, a striped sock, my favorite, no less floating mischievously at the back of the dryer in a house as enchanted as mine. One expects a bit of magical shenanigans, but laundry should be sacred. Come on, get over here. As I reached for my sock, I felt a tug. This wasn't just static clean, it was a full fledged pull. A game of tug of war ensued with an unseen adversary. Despite my best efforts, the soc and I with it was suddenly yanked into the dryer and. Just like that, I found myself spiraling through a portal.

 

 

DR. APPLES 

(03:11)
Note to self, never trust appliances from a hair museum gift shop. And there I landed in a realm that smelled suspiciously of lavender. And, hmm, is that a hint of forgotten passwords?

 

 

DR. APPLES

 (03:50)
Upon rising, lo and behold, an enormous mega mall unfolded before me as vast as my collection of screenshots on my phone. The legends were true. 

 

4:06

This Marvel is known as the Lost and Found mega Store.  A warehouse for belongings on a brief hiatus. As I stepped inside my eyes marveled at endless aisles filled with missing relics of days past missing earring backs. USB drives unsent text messages, ponytail holders, accents during a conversation, placebos, Tupperware lids, everything. . 

 

4:53

Ah. And what do we have here? The badge brigadier. I remember the summer I turned 25. It was when I became obsessed with becoming a badge making mogul. I sold 15 a day and held three on layaway each week. I'd assume they would be a hit. My memory escapes me. I forgot why I stopped. These shiny badges looked authentic, but were a third of the cost out of sentiment. I had to make a badge for old times sake. You just type
 
 (05:39)
Mm.

(05:42)
My badge reads fro-fessional finder of things. Blasted F key.

  (05:50)
Oh, yeah. Now I remember they had a recall.

DR. APPLES (05:56)
Hmmm. Guess that would explain how Duck Butter Inc. Went out business after their promotional badges hit the religious farmer's markets. Hmm. But this badge is noise. I'm going to pin it on me here. Right here.

 

6:19

 Even though I'm around this amazing trove of forgotten treasures, I wanted to go home. I had simpler plans. A binge session of Hex Your Ex Revenge for the Broken Hearted awaited me on my DVR. I was on my way to turn around and leave when a squeaky toy falls before me. What's this? I stepped forward to retrieve it, but step on it instead.

 

6:54

Oh dear. Great. Just my luck. A trap door, a floor beneath me gives way.
 
 (07:11)
Ahhhhh- Oh, that hurt. I found myself in an underground basketball court, dimly lit, framed photos of fashionable shoes and shoe laces adorned the area. As I gathered myself a distinct voice echoed in the shadowy space.

FLIP FLAP (07:34)
Hey. Hey, dude. Whatcha doing here? 

 

 

DR. APPLES 

(07:40)
A flip flop hopped with the demeanor of a beach bum. It's rubbery face twisted into what could pass for a frown. Sizing me up as friend or foam. His flip flop eyes landed on the badge pinned to my blazer. 
 
FLIP FLAP

 (07:59)
I'm so sorry, sir. Uh, you're early. Um, so sorry, man. Uh, I'm flip flap. 
 
DR. APPLES 

(08:10)
Hmmm. I assume he believes I'm part of some agency with this badge. Okay. I can play this angle. Oh, I'm Dr. Um, I'm doctor. Um, Mr. Apples. I'm from the professional finder of things. 
 
FLIP FLAP 

(08:32)
Uh, what, 
 
DR. APPLES

 (08:33)
Uh, you can call it the FFF. 
 
FLIP FLAP 

(08:37)
Oh, FFF, uh, is that what your division is called? 
 
DR. APPLES 

(08:43)
Yes. 
 
BOOTISTA 

(08:44)
Flip flap. Who you talking to? 
 
DR. APPLES 

(08:51)
Among the dim shuttles, a distant figure emerged a bulky wrestling shoe. It's laces fray from countless smack downs. Accompanying him was a sleek red stiletto pump, radiating an air of sharp elegance. Also coming was a well worn running shoe. It's treads faded from running away from responsibility. As they hopped towards me, I realized escape wasn't an option. The exits were unknown. It was time to improvise, uh, more than I was currently doing. 
 
FLIP FLAP 

(09:33)
Boss. This is the auditor from the division of, uh, (pronunces) Fa- , Fa, Fa, Fa
 
DR. APPLES 

(09:38)
No Stop. 
 
DR. APPLES

 (09:42)
Auditor. Oh, you are early. Um, I, I'm Mr. Bootista. Hey guys. Come here. 
 
DR. APPLES 

(09:54)
Bootistia mumbled to the rest of the shoes. They all nodded in agreement and scurried away from us. 
 
DR. APPLES

 (10:04)
I am Dr. Uh, Mr. I am Mr. Apples. 
 
BOOTISTA 

(10:11)
So, uh, let me guess. You are here early so you don't miss wrestle Ram on TV tonight. 
 
DR. APPLES 

(10:22)
Could we get this along? 
 
BOOTISTA

 (10:24)
Well, saves me from pretending I was actually busy. Um, follow me, sir. Flip flop. Stay here. 
 
FLIP FLAP

 (10:33)
You got it. I'll keep my laces tied here. , 
 
BOOTISTA 

(10:40)
(cringe) 
 
DR. APPLES

 (10:42)
Batista led me through a corridor aligned with aging lockers. He strided in uneven rhythm of vigorous hops and pensive limbs. A silent symphony of past glories and present duties. 
 
BOOTISTA

 (10:57)
Notice my hops got a bit of a hitch. No worries, Mr. Auditor. I managed just fine. There was a time back before my stint as a vintage shoe organizer when I graced the wrestling ring part of the legendary duo that rocked the mats at the World Wrestling finals until my human took a bad fall, snapped his Achilles. And, well, that was, that life's funny, isn't it? 
 
DR. APPLES

 (11:30)
I am here for business, not for exposition. Mr. uti. 
 
BOOTISTA

 (11:35)
Right, right. Yeah. Tough leather. 
 
DR. APPLES 

(11:47)
As we entered the back office, it was cluttered and disorganized. Papers were stacked on tables and scattered across the floor. Behind a desk, a vivid red po suddenly clicked her way towards us. Her luster. A stark contrast to the surrounding paper chaos. 
 
URSHOELA

 (12:05)
A new visitor. Welcome. Welcome. I am Urshoela. Make sure you don't confuse me with my less notable twin Ursola. We call this area Earth filling system. 
 
DR. APPLES 

(12:26)
Filing system? Mm-Hmm.
 
URSHOELA 

(12:31)
No. Um, the cabinets are on indefinite back order. I used to commence stages. You know, now I sort through these echo of past performances. 
 
DR. APPLES

 (12:54)
Oh God. 
 
URSHOELA

 (12:56)
Dreaming of the day. They, and perhaps I will. 
 
DR. APPLES 

(13:02)
Excuse me. 
 
URSHOELA 

(13:03)
Oh, 
 
DR. APPLES

 (13:05)
I don't care. 
 
URSHOELA

 (13:06)
Um, I, 
 
DR. APPLES

 (13:08)
The audit? 
 
URSHOELA

 (13:10)
I'm so, so sorry. 
 
DR. APPLES 

(13:12)
Right? Can we move on, Mr. Bootista? 
 
BOOTISTA

 (13:17)
Uh, Right this way. 
 
DR. APPLES

 (13:27)
We stroll along the hall as Urshoela follows behind, as we go through a door in the hallway, it's colder than the other areas. I must admit this was getting a bit spooky even for me. 
 
URSHOELA

 (13:44)
You don't seem to have a pen or a notepad. Mr. Rodar. 
 
DR. APPLES

 (13:50)
Ah, my dear, I possess a fantastic memory. The best auditors keep it all up here safely tucked away in the old mental sock drawer. 
 
URSHOELA

 (14:02)
What, what you know about socks? 
 
DR. APPLES 

(14:05)
What socks? 
 
BOOTISTA

 (14:06)
Urshoela...Scram. 
 
URSHOELA

 (14:07)
What? 
 
DR. APPLES

 (14:13)
We arrive at another large basketball court, a massive machine blocking the rest of the view. It buzzed like the hum of vibrating gremlins. There's a hint of sweat mingling with as-paragus? Just as I pondered the peculiar aroma, A vibrant track sneaker rushed to me. 
 
KICKS FURRY

 (14:42)
Hey Mr. Guy! I'm Kicks Fury, once a marathon champion's choice —until I wasn't. Check this out -the Shoe Sweat Infused Olive Oil extractor. We squeeze the energy right out of us. It’s potent. It’s powerful! -fuel for those who think store-bought olive oil is legit!
 
DR. APPLES

 (15:08)
Athletes sweat turned into oil. Hmmm... Equivocating. 
 
KICKS FURRY 

(15:16)
. Yeah. Absolutely. 
 
DR. APPLES 

(15:20)
You don't know what that word means, do you? 
 
KICKS FURRY

 (15:23)
I don't. Uh, but, uh, it's all truthfully natural, totally above board. I assure you. 
 
DR. APPLES

 (15:30)
Natural you say. And all cleared with the health department, I presume ?
 
KICKS FURRY

 (15:36)
. Well, it's a niche market. Very exclusive. Uh, not cheating, just strategically evading oversight. 
 
DR. APPLES 

(15:45)
Riveting. 
 
KICKS FURRY

 (15:46)
Ha. I know that word. 
 
BOOTISTA

 (15:51)
Alright. Enough chatter. Mr. Fruit. Let's show you something else over here. 
 
DR. APPLES

 (16:00)
We walked behind the machine and was standing before another massive machine and imposing contraption that looked like it belonged in a steampunk nightmare. It hummed and groaned with life towering above us with an intricate array of gears, levers, and tools. Oil slicks, glisten on its surface reflecting the dim light. Like a grotesque metallic beast smelled like the time I mixed a love potion with bleach in the lab. 
 
BOOTISTA 

(16:36)
Don't look so tense, Mr. Fruit. We're not cooking up anything sinister here. At least not for you. 
 
DR. APPLES

 (16:46)
Why'd you say it like that? 
 
BOOTISTA

 (16:48)
I'm sorry. 
 
DR. APPLES 

(16:49)
That was weird. 
 
BOOTISTA 

(16:50)
I don't know. I'm sorry. I was trying something new. 
 
DR. APPLES

 (16:57)
I have to admit, I'm not entirely convinced they bought my rules. I am not convinced they are smart either. No time to overthink. I need to wrap this up. Plus I have to pee before me. Ula stood next to the gargantuan machine. 
 
BOOTISTA 

(17:19)
Ursula stations this sector as well. This is a, uh, sensitive area for flip flop. 
 
DR. APPLES

 (17:27)
She had a slightly manic grin as if she'd been inhaling too many of the fumes. 
 
URSHOELA

 (17:33)
  Here is our flip-flop upcycling machine. Darling. 
 
DR. APPLES

 (17:41)
Is this contraption gentle or simply scarring the flip flops into new shapes? 
 
URSHOELA

 (17:47)
Yes, but also, no. We transform worn out flip flops into vibrant phone cases. Eco-friendly here. Hold one. 
 
DR. APPLES 

(18:00)
The phone case was unexpectedly pleasant to hold. Soft, almost like holding a grenade made of jelly. Hmm. Design's a bit mid, but I suppose it would do in a pinch. Seems like the perfect solution for reducing the carbon footprint. 
 
URSHOELA

 (18:19)
Absolutely. We make sure to make a hundred thousand a day, uh, just in case. 
 
DR. APPLES

 (18:24)
Uh, I don't think that, 
 
BOOTISTA 

(18:27)
Hey, come over here guys. You forgot to clean the other drawer. A machine. Okay. Okay. Why didn't you clean the machine? Why didn't you clean this other machine? Huh? 
 
DR. APPLES

 (18:41)
The shoes scurried over to their boss.

 

DR. APPLES 

(18:45)
Amidst their bickering. A familiar hum, whispered from across the room, drawing my attention like a siren's. Call that hum. It's from a dryer just like mine. Let's see what secrets it holds. It better be the exit. All I have to do is open the door and. 
 
Socks: 

(19:11)
<scream>
 
SOCK 1

(19:19)

(desperate)

Please! Help us!

 

SOCK 2

(19:22)

Can we go home now?

 

SOCK 3

(19:24)

(sad)

I use to warm the toe of an astronaut.

 

SOCK 7

(19:28)
I’ve been stuck here since the Cold War!

 

SOCK 5

(19:32)

Hey, you’re not a shoe!

 

SOCK 6

(19:36)

 

I will never be your sock puppet! I will never talk. (spits)

 

DR. APPLES

(19:42)

Hey, easy. Nooo, I am not a shoe. What’s going on here? Inside the dryer was a treasure trove of mismatched socks. Peering further in, the space seemed to stretch to infinity. There must have been millions of them! 

 

SOCK 1

20:03

Hey! Where are the shoes?

 

DR. APPLES

20:06

They’re over there, plotting my demise.

 

SOCK 2

20:09

Great. Mister, you gotta help us! These nefarious shoes kidnapped all of us out of our dryers.

 

SOCK 3

20:14

They’ve been doing this for centuries!

 

SOCK 4

20:17

They take us, then request ransom. They never get it. I don’t think they know how to mail letters.

 

SOCK 2 

20:28

(whispers) 

I told them about stamps!

 

SOCK 3

20:28

Shhh. Look, get us outta here! I don’t want my twin thinking I eloped with fishnets!

 

DR. APPLES

20:33

Say no more. I’m here to help.

 

SOCKS

20:36

Thank you. Thank you!

 

SOCK 1

20:42

By the way, who are you, Mister?

 

DR. APPLES

20:43

(delighted)

Oh, I’m a wizard doctor on the hunt to find his mother who’s been kidnapp—

 

SOCKS

20:48

(interrupts)

Huh?

 

SOCK 2

20:50

Look! He has a badge! 

 

DR. APPLES

20:53 

(nervous)

Oh. Well, I’m a Fro-fessional Finder of Fings.

 

SOCKS 4

20:58

A what?

 

DR. APPLES

21:00

I’m from the F.F.F.

 

SOCK 5

21:02

Who?

 

SOCK 1

21:02
 Hey guys, he’s from the (pronounce) Ffffffff...

 

SOCK 4

21:08

A wha-?

 

SOCK 2

21:010

He’s the Fffff!

 

CHORUS OF SOCKS

21:14

Ooooh!

The (pronounce) Ffffff... Ffffff...

 

DR. APPLES

21:15

No. No, Shhhh! Shhh!

 

BOOT-TISTA

21:20

(yells)

Hey, what’s going on over there? Uhh... Mr. Auditor, no-no. Uhh. Don’t look in there.

 

The dryer door slams SHUT.

 

SOCKS

21:42

Nooo!

 

DR. APPLES

21:30

After closing the dryer door, the boss and his crew scurry around me like gamblers chasing a hot streak.

 

FLIP-FLAP

21:37

Heeey! Don’t mind that. We’re just flip-floppin’ around!

 

Boot-tista CRINGES at Flip-Flap’s pun. 

 

BOOT-TISTA

21:44

Look, you didn’t see what you just saw. We’re just, uh, experimenting with something new. He. He.

 

DR. APPLES

21:52

New? Some of those socks are centuries old.

 

BOOT-TISTA

21:56

Ha. Ha. Exactly! Keeping these socks out of circulation from humans drives up sales and our stocks go through the roof!

 

URSHOELA

22:05

Maybe we can cut a deal, Mr. Auditor? What's your price?

 

BOOT-TISTA

22:10

Hold that thought, Urshoela. Look Sir, we know you’ve lost some things before. I’m certain we can help… retrieve that….

 

DR. APPLES

 (22:20)
Cut the music. No. No. Hmm. No more sappy monologues. 
 
BOOTISTA 

(22:29)
Oh, I'm sorry. You wouldn't spill our secrets, right?

 

FLIP-FLAP 

22:34

Just roll with it, man. Life’s about surfing the sole-tide!

 

Everyone CRINGES.

22:41

 

DR. APPLES

22:47

Seriously? He does this all day?

 

BOOT-TISTA

22:51

All day. It’s why he’s in the front. 

 

FLIP-FLAP

22:54

Dawwwww.

 

DR. APPLES 

22:58

Hmm, let me ponder for a moment….

 

23:02

It's time to cleanse this shady operation. The stakes are higher than ever.

 

These socks aren't just fabric; they're fragments of lives and histories, desperately waiting to be set right. 

 

23:17

This isn't just about laundry—it's about ignoring the urge to pee, and legacy!

 

And in this twisted tale, I'm not just any auditor—I'm the hero these socks, and maybe even this world, needs!

 

KNOCK ON DOOR

 

AUDITOR

23:37

Open up. Inspection time! I'm the Auditor.

 

DR. APPLES

23:42

(Gasp) Mother duckbutter!

 

SHOES

23:47

Auditor? Isn’t he the auditor? Another auditor?

 

DR. APPLES

23:58

(nervous)

Uhhh... I forgot to tell my colleague that we switched shifts. Mind if I handle this?

 

 

BOOT-TISTA 

24:07

Hey! This isn’t over, Mr. Fruits. Remember, the shoe always lands on the other foot... eventually.

 

DR. APPLES

Suure. Sure. Let me just…

 

BOOT-TISTA 

24:16

Every shoe has its pair.

 

DR. APPLES

24:2

Got it. 

 

BOOT-TISTA 

24:22

And every sole has two sides!

 

DR. APPLES

24:26

(annoyed)

I’m not doing these puns from you too. 

 

24:32

I rushed to the door, swinging it open to reveal a persnickety auditor. 

 

His clipboard poised like a weapon of endless follow-ups.

 

AUDITOR

24:43

Good afternoon, I’m here to—

 

DR. APPLES

24:45

(decisively)

No time to dilly-dally, follow me if you fancy a life of bliss filled with ignorance!

 

24:53

I spun the Auditor around, slamming the syndicate’s door with a flourish.

 

AUDITOR

24:58

But I need to-

 

DR. APPLES

24:59

Trust me, Auditor, some mysteries should be left……. 

-insert joke here.

 

AUDITOR

25:06

What?

 

DR. APPLES

25:09

Nothing.

(sigh) 

I think they forgot to line-edit. 

 

AUDITOR

25:14

At least you have a story arc.

 

DR. APPLES

Just show me the door you entered from.

 

DR. APPLES

25:21

And just like that, the Auditor pointed to the exit. 

Which was none other than one of the large photos on the wall —classic misdirection. Go figure!

 

DR. APPLES

25:43

And that’s why I’m here. 

 

25:45

A few weeks later, I received a box filled with my missing unmentionables and one of my Mommy’s socks. If Lacie had seen this, she’d have probably disinfected it first.

 

26:00

Attached to the sock were lint balls, oddly arranged in a pattern. It didn’t take long to realize they formed a map. Another link to my quest to find her. As for rescuing the socks?

 

(chuckles)

 

26:19

I forgot. Funny how stories can jog the memory. Let’s see where this map leads, and I’ll circle back if necessary.

 

26:32

Most importantly, the moral of our story is: if it shrinks in the wash, it wasn’t meant to be in your life. You know I’ve-

 

(phone RINGS)

 

26:48

Oh! Excuse me. Come on. Come on. 

 

(searches for phone, opens it)

 

26:55

Uh, hello?

 

MR. STEINER V.O.

26:56

(delighted)

Yoo-hoooo! Dr. Applesssss! Hey, ya ready to play Astro-Tag?

 

DR. APPLES

27:03

Oh my goodness, I almost forgot!

 

MR. STEINER V.O.

27:09

Just a heads up—I've been moon-jogging!

 

DR. APPLES

27:12

(excited)

Hang on! Let me get my galactic go-go galoshes and I’ll be there in 10 quantum leaps.

 

MR. STEINER V.O.

27:18

I’m gonna win!

 

DR. APPLES

27:19

Oh, no you won’t!

 

(hangs up)
 
 DR. APPLES 

27:21

Well, I gotta dash. Until next time, keep your socks paired and your laundry free from agitating adjectives.

 

27:33

Stay cynical, my friends.

(goes into a vortex)

 

27:38

Weeee!

 

Narrator: 

(27:59)
And just like that we spiral back from the enchanting rounds of Dr. Apples our journey through his magical time warp concludes for now. But the wonder doesn't have to end here. 

 

28:13

Don't forget to like, subscribe, leave a review in stuff until our next whimsical adventure. Keep your imaginations wild. Dr. Apples will be waiting with more spell binding stories.
 
 (28:30)
And don't be startled if your cat starts reciting poetry. It's just under the spells. Enchanting stories.
 
 
 

 

 

 

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